Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Charlie Joe Jackson
Happy birthday to you!

That’s right. CHARLIE JOE JACKSON’S GUIDE TO NOT READING is one month old tomorrow.

He looks great, doesn’t he?

We’ve got lots planned!

I thought we’d start the day by going out to his favorite deli for breakfast – bacon, egg and cheese sandwich, of course – before retiring to the couch for a little morning Sportscenter. Then, a walk by the lake with the dogs, which he just loves – LOVES – and afterwards, perhaps a stop at Sunny Dae’s ice-cream shop on the way home.

Afternoon nap, of course.

‘Round about supper time maybe we’ll grab the wife and go out for cheeseburgers down at the beach, wash it down with an Arnold Palmer (half pink lemonade, half iced tea), and stroll a bit by the Sound. Then… is a second ice-cream pit stop in one day too much? Not on a birthday, right? So we’ll hit Carvel on the way home for a Brown Bonnet (chocolate on chocolate, of course). Large size.

At night, hit the couch for a little baseball, and maybe an episode of Breaking Bad (Season 3), to complete a perfect day.

Doesn’t that sound like an amazing birthday?

Right, right, I know what you’re thinking. Books don’t celebrate birthdays. Books aren’t alive. Books don’t actually eat ice cream.

So what? Their authors do, don’t they?

And that’s good enough for me.

God, I love birthdays.